Okay, my list of birth defects was a really weird and random way of saying that I’m tired of being…..yeaahh. Like…you know…I would so much rather be a sketchy person, a redundant person, a heinously stupid or unattractive or obese person, a clingy and needy person, anything but an awkward person!!! Awkward is stupid. Not saying anything and standing around like a moron half the time is a stupid and pathetic thing!

Oh, I just thought of a constructive idea!! I will now practice changing my personality ONE STEP AT A TIME so that tomorrow I will have moved away from being awkward and into the endless opportunities of other negative personality traits. So here’s my trial run…

Sketchy:
Heh heh, yeah, we went to school, I hid behind the vending machine and leered at little freshmen. During history I went into the bathroom and made hitlist # 3454 as I donned my creepy black makeup and sharpened all my knives. Then I decided to stalk a shrimpy little boy for the rest of the day. I tripped him and stole $89 from his backpack. It was awesome. I used the money to buy pot for my 11 year old boyfriend.

Redundant:
School this year starts at 7:45 AM. That’s AM not PM. Such a time is rather early. 7:45 AM is the time at which school starts and I find it rather early. Sometimes there is not a lot of time to sleep especially when I stay up late studying. There is a Spanish girl staying with me and I often have to stay up late studying once she goes to bed. In the morning I have to wake up because school starts at 7:45 AM. If I get there at 7:45 AM and 10 seconds, that is too late. But I am often tired because I stayed up late studying. Then I have to wake up early. There is a Spanish girl staying with me who is nice. The Spanish girl is quite a nice person. But school starts early. It starts at 7:45 AM.

Mentally impaired:
I laik go skool i have 6 teechers in one class we rite in anuther counnting nmbrs laik whon too thre four it fun see frands

Clingy/needy:
Um okay so the school year started and I don’t know WHAT anybody is thinking but like Philly Foo Foo totally said he would walk me between my classes and he completely forgot after math and so I was stuck there and he made me miss my art class!!! I mean because I am not going all the way down two flights of stairs to art all by myself! So I went back into math and asked if I could sit down and start the homework and the teacher was like “sure” but THEN I asked her to write me notes on the section and solve number one for me and she was being such an imbecile about it, but that’s when Philly FINALLY showed up!!! Only he had lunch and I had no money so I convinced him to buy me a sandwich and a coke and a fresh apple pie downtown. Except then a girl from my science class showed up and like I completely needed the homework but she WOULDN’T let me copy it and that’s when Philly drove away without me!!! I cried and cried and I didn’t want to be stranded alone like a 1/2 mile from the school so a guy working in the sewer asked if I wanted to come down. So I got to stay with him all day and it wasn’t so bad.

Heinously obese:
I went to school. I went to the cafeteria. They had baked a batch of muffins. I stole the muffins. I ate the muffins. The muffins were good. Then I ate three pepperoni pizzas. They should put more chocolate on the pizza next time.

So, which one can you see happening, or any other suggestions?